THE REDNECK WAY

There's a lot of jokes about Rednecks and duct tape but it's true. Rednecks can fix anything with duct tape. Look in a Redneck's truck and you will find duct tape, ratchet straps, come-alongs and baling wire. That and a hammer, cresent wrench and pliers you can do anything. Although it can be tricky. A guy I know slid off a muddy road & got stuck. He hooked his come-along around a tree to try and pull the truck out but it wouldn't come, so he got the brilliant idea to put a rock on the gas pedal and wedge a stick in the steering wheel so the wheels would stay going straight. The truck came out of the mud on the second pull but when it jerked the stick broke so the steering wheel was free and the truck started driving around the tree. He slipped the first try to get in the driver's door and it ran over his foot. He got in the second try and got it stopped just as it snugged up against the tree. I swear to you I am not making this up.

Rednecks keep everything, as I mentioned before, in case something needs to be fixed or they need to build something, When you're driving around you can tell a redneck's house. There will be junked out trucks, farm equipment, lumber, pipe, rolls of barb wire "out back".  Then there's the old house deal. Around here you'll be driving by a nice place then see an old falling in trailer house or a dilapidated house with half of the roof gone behind the nice house.  Most of them look like the next big thunderstorm we have will blow the down but there they sit. I guess they're saving them for parts too. Another reliable tell is the house will be rundown but there will be a nice new barn or shop beside it. There are the places where there's a frame up for a shop or barn but it's never been finished. Then there's the places where the horses and/or cows are grazing in the front yard and there's round bales of hay lined along the driveway,

Then there's the scarier places that sit back off the road that you can't see. There's a driveway with a pack of dogs lying in the middle of it. Kind of like my husband's great uncle's place. His great aunt & uncle lived in the Timber Hills in a salvage. All you could see from the road was the shop but over the rise were 2 ancient trailer houses. They lived in one with one of their daughters and her daughter & husband. Their other daughter and her husband and their 3 kids lived in the other. When you drove up the driveway all whole mess of snot nosed bare footed kids would scatter leaving a pack of mangy dogs and bunch of chickens with about 5 feathers on each of them. The kids were going to worn the grown ups someone was there and who it was. Strangers did not pull up that driveway, not that there were any strangers driving around out there any way. Don't get me wrong, when you went in the houses they were always spotless. I don't remember a time that we showed up that we weren't offered a plate of food and a drink and a place to sleep if it started getting late. They didn't have much but whatever they had was ours if we needed it because we were family and family takes care of one another. That, my friends is the Redneck Way,

REDNECKS & FOOTBALL

HAPPY NEW YEAR ya'll!! We survived the holiday season. Another college football season is behind us, Bama's Crimson Tide won another championship. The deep south is full of happy rednecks. Professional football play offs have started. My Saints are out, so I'm not that excited about it. In the south football is a big deal, a very big deal. You don't even want to mention the hated BCS. It's the opinion of most redneck football fans that they've ruined the college football bowl season. We prefer the good ol days when the only bowl games were the Rose, Orange & Sugar bowls. The winner of the Rose or Orang e bowl would be the national champs. That was back when the Alabama, Auburn, Florida, USC, UCLA, Michigan, Penn State, Texas and of course my beloved Oklahoma Sooners were THE teams and one of them would usually win the National Championship. Here in Oklahoma folks include their season tickets in their Will. In town on Saturdays everybody is wearing shirts, hoodies & jerseys or at least, the colors of their favorite team. Every where you go, if they have a TV, college football is on. I've been with my mom, sister & grandma at the mall shopping and found a store with TVs in the window so that I could stand there and watch the OU-Texas game. Oklahoma-Texas is one of the best known rivalries in college football. The Red River Showdown has been the driving force behind a lot of things. Oklahoma fans have shirts, hats & window decals with the Longhorn head upside down on it and songs to be written. Years ago, when I was in school, there was always a battle of graffiti spray painted on every overpass between Dallas and Norman and numerous, sometimes obscene jokes about Bevo, the Longhorns mascot. Then there's Bedlam, the game between the 2 main Oklahoma teams, the OU Sooners & Oklahoma State Cowboys or Pokes. You're either a fan of one or the other. Very seldom do you find someone that likes both teams. I know Sooner fans that won't wear orange ever because it's Oklahoma State's school color. Same with Pokes fans, you won't catch them wearing the crimson color of the Sooners. I finally got to go to an Oklahoma football game, and it is one of the coolest things that I've ever gotten to do. When the Pride of Oklahoma marching band starts out on to the field and the drum major comes through them high stepping down the field while the band breaks in to the song Oklahoma gave me the chills. It's not just college ball either. High school football is a big deal too. I was leaving Bartlesville on a Friday evening and passed the Owasso team coming in to town for their games. The Rams rolled in to town on 2 coach touring buses for the team, 6 of their school buses, which look like Greyhound buses with a semi truck bringing up the rear carrying the equipment for the Pride of Owasso marching band. If you want to add the intimidation factor to your game, that's the way to do it. The Bartlesville newspaper had a big sports write up about the Caney Valley Trojans, from here in Ramona, possibly making the playoffs for the first time since 1980, when my husband played for them, when they were state champions. My family makes the play off games when their alma mater, the Wynnewood Savages, are playing. My Dad being a former Savage, it's only natural. We love our football! If you don't believe me all you have to do is read all the t shirts, hoodies & caps walking around, the bumper stickers & vanity plates on the cars & trucks in front of you.